This writing is based on a synthesis of reading and writing, talking about, on and through concepts presented by a number of different sources and authors. This includes but is not limited to John Bradshaw, Dr. Patrick Carnes and others.
One of the most helpful spiritual concepts that I have found to be absolutely true is that whatever you shine the light on, ceases to have power over you. Sharing the most vulnerable, broken aspect of oneself, creates a bridge between isolation and community. With this in mind, I decided to dedicate space on this blog to the topic of deprivation. Let's take a step back and make sure we are on the same page with what I am talking about. I like this definition of deprivation found on google dictionary.
Now that we have established a shared understanding of the word, deprivation, I would like to provide a context for the work I am presenting to you.
If you are looking to do a deep dive into healing trauma, which I would suggest include working with a therapist on an ongoing basis, establishing a community support system, whether that includes a 12 step program and/or group therapy, and addressing compulsive and addictive behavior, looking at your relationship to deprivation will be necessary at some point in time. This work is designed to be a method to enhance your own process, to raise questions and provide a point of view designed to increase your rate of progress towards realization of your true self.
In this three part series, we will take a look at three areas of deprivation - 1) intimacy (love, affection and attention) 2) resources (material needs and desires) 3) self expression (ability to express unfiltered, innocent and creative ideas).
In looking at these three areas, I hope to communicate both a vulnerability in bringing up the topic of deprivation as well as connecting the impact of each of these three areas on all aspects of life.
Deprivation is not a bad word. It simply, is. When we are in it, we are in it. You certainly know the feeling of deprivation when you feel it. There is no mistaking it. There is no shame in deprivation, just as there is no shame in any compulsive behavior such as drinking to get drunk and numb out. Deprivation serves the same purpose, to numb and dissociate in an environment that feels overwhelming and toxic. At the heart of deprivation is a deep desire to control the uncontrollable, however when we engage in deprivation behavior, we achieve the opposite of our intended goal - chaos and isolation.
The goal of the 3 part deprivation series is to introduce and present the concept that deprivation is a reaction to an out of control feeling situation, a coping mechanism just like any other compulsive behavior. Like other compulsive behaviors, deprivation can be healed in much the same way. Sharing about the compulsive nature of deprivation is a part of the healing process towards full integration and abundance.
I urge you to journal about one or more of the three areas of deprivation mentioned above.
Some questions to consider in your writing: - How does this topic sit with you? Do you find yourself reacting to even the word, deprivation? Is there anything that comes up for you physically when you are thinking about and writing on the concept of deprivation and the role of deprivation in your own behavior in the past, present, and in future plans?
As always, thank you so much! I look forward to sharing in this 3 part journey with you. Please be gentle with yourself, and I'll do the same :-)